A interesting article to share from the Lunch Actually founder, Violet Lim, from a newsletter I subscribed to.
Often we learn about people who have dated for ten years. Though one or two cases of these long dating results in marriage, most of the cases result in heart break instead. Women are the most losers. But we also know that a number of men have also been at the receiving end of such fruitless relationship efforts.
Most people who hang out on this kind of relationship may or may not pick up the tell-tale signs. Many do but choose to ignore them. There are ways one could know if a relationship is growing, stunted or dying.
Here are ways to know if your relationship is growing:
Your partner seeks and honors your opinion on important issues - Dating partners are not obliged to bring their dates into their daily or important activities. However, in a growing relationship, partners are always considerate of the other person and the likely impact of their plans and actions on the relationship. They want know if what he or she is after jives with the other person. When your opinion is sort and received, it is usually taken seriously is a sign that your relationship is on the bounce.
He or she wants to be your only date - At this stage, courtship is around the corner. Though not really jealous, the partner starts to crowd others out. He or she happily introduces you to everybody around partly out of pride in you and partly because he or she wants people to know that both of you are occupied.
He or she lets you into daily routine - When your dating partner starts making sure that you are in his or her radar every day, when you know what he or she is about for the week or month, then you can be sure the relationship is evolving. The opposite of this is when you are not able to know when you can meet him or her at home or work or when your next date meeting is occurring. We can all remember when a date starts lying about his or her whereabouts.
Pays attention when you talk - When you discover that your partner pays attention when you talk, when you see that he or she is actively listening to you, when you begin to feel that you are having meaningful conversation and communication, then you can know that your relationship is growing. One of the ways to sustain this situation is to reciprocate the action.
Shows interest in knowing more about you - When your date starts asking questions about your childhood, your job, your parents, he or she want to get to know you well, feel your stress at work and your early childhood experiences, then you can feel the buildup of satisfaction. Your partner as a sign of his or her growing interest could ask whether you slept well, what time you woke up from sleep that morning. Being interested in these small details of your life are signs of growth of the relationship.
Multiple calls and text messages daily - When you start getting this from a date, it is a sign that you are on his or her mind. If there is any interesting thing happening in his or her life during the day, he or she wants you to be among the first people to know. He or she takes advantage of any developing news or events in the society or community to connect with you by letting you know these things. He or she uses every chance to connect with you when the relationship is important to him or her.
Labels: articles, Experiences, happiness, Life, love, meaningful, relationship
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